He messaged me on Growlr. There was a guy all hunk in a pic. He liked my photo and decided to contact me. Few talks, he asked me about my role. I didn’t wanna do attitude regarding such question, so i answered him that I’m a top, he answered back saying he was a double. Double?! Well i got over the shock and understood he meant a versatile. Fine with me, we exchanged numbers and decided to meet for a fuck later on.
3 days afterwards, he messaged me on whatsapp, i was free, he was too. We decided to meet at 12 in the evening, he finishes work around that time, and i was off for once wandering Hamra as it was long time i visited “Le Marais” of Beirut, “Province town of Lebanon”. I told him to meet me in Costa, a classic that became a 24/7 for meetings. He didn’t know where that was. He asked me to meet him in front of Barbar Hamra. Fair with me.
We met, he was in my car.
Lately, I’m trying to project a certain rough careless indifferent look. What?! People are abusing my caring-ness and i was there for a fuck, sue my ass!!!
I managed to do so, till 5 minutes after we went to bed. The guy turned to be a “Shami”, from Sham in Syria. He’s been in Beirut for 3 months now. He was a teddy bear hunk. Never was I in bed with a guy like him. He’s a 170 cm guy who’s just big by nature. Like really big bones, big hands, big feet, like really big wide feet. Got me turned on i must admit. His skin was very soft, covering a lot of genuine muscles, which is the contrary of Gym muscles. Well he used to work in Shawarma in Syria, now he’s working in a restaurant.
So yeah! There he was, a genuine man, which is the opposite of “Straight Acting” one as they like to call it on Grindr. Urgh do people even realize how homophobic is that statement?!?! Dahhhh Ling are you coming out as an actress?! Like you think you’re staging Broadway?! Let me not go there….
So yeah! There he was, my man, he was a good kisser, strong hugger, someone who perceives himself as a man, and acknowledges the presence of a second man in bed. He showed appreciation for what i had down there.
Yes i was trying to be indifferent, yet he wouldn’t let me. He imposed his presence in the cutest oriental manly behaviors. He made me smile several times. He wondered why i was smiling several times, with his “Shami” accent that i imitated several times. He was a genuine, a cute genuine, i had the feeling that i really had a man laying there, made me remember why i was into men in the first place. I even felt it was exotic, you know, similar for what Europeans look for in Arabs. Some even come here just for the sake of being with an Arabic oriental man. I hear you Sistas. I know why you seek it now.
I was with a man, “manly playful like a grown up child”, rubbing his beard on mine, making me lick his armpit, holding me with force so I’d do the same, trying to wrestle me in my own bed. He held my chin sometimes while looking deep in my eyes, held my dick sometimes too, he played with my legs, kissed my feet, smelled my skin. Not only that, he told me he was praying that I’d have a belly. He said it in a cuddly way, “Battoun” was the term he used, the Arabic cuddly nickname of a belly. What?! Praying for that?! Why waste your prayers?! Well obviously it meant to him a lot. He dived in it. Like literally dived into it, putting his nose on it and rubbing left and right quickly. I have high admiration for myself, my small belly included, yet he made me feel at a certain point like, well, a belly. He just focused on it. He made me smile again. And again. And again. Well it was ticklish. He bit my meat! No I’m not talking about my dick you perverts! I’m talking about my actual meat. Woof!! Man, he was rough.
He highlighted the size of my dick, he said he was too tight to take it. Well true he was, he couldn’t take it, we tried, yet i never perceived my dick as a big one. Well he was tight, and he appreciates small dicks. Some people would die for a big dick stupid! Not him, he even preferred if his was smaller, “what is it for but for peeing?” he said. He has a point. I never understood how we cultivated in us the admiration for “Big”. Does size really matter?! Well yeah, if you had the tunnel of Shekka down there (a well reputed tunnel in the village of Shekka in Lebanon). Not his case.
Fine with me, sometimes the act of penetrating doesn’t really matter, as the feeling of conquest was there, that day i conquered a man, a real man, he conquered me too, the rest was meaningless.
Do you miss Syria?! I asked
Fuck Syria, and its sands…
It’s not nice to talk like that about your country
When you don’t have anyone that matters left there, you know it’s not your country anymore…
He had a tear in the eye.